


Let's Just Pretend That's Snow

by solikethesea



Category: Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys (Album), My Chemical Romance, The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys (Comic)
Genre: Christmas, Christmas Presents, Christmas in the Desert, Companionable Snark, Families of Choice, Fluff, Fluff without Plot, Gen, Inspired By Tumblr, No Romance, One Shot, Surprises, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-26
Updated: 2015-12-26
Packaged: 2018-05-09 12:19:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5539730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/solikethesea/pseuds/solikethesea
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Life in the zones is difficult. Christmas in the zones, however, doesn't have to be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Let's Just Pretend That's Snow

**Author's Note:**

> this is late, i wanted to post it like, actually on christmas, but oh well.
> 
> inspired by [this fucking post](http://killjoy-aesthetic.tumblr.com/post/135890845422/merry-christmas-from-zone-6-throws-sand-lets) from [killjoy-aesthetic](http://killjoy-aesthetic.tumblr.com) on tumblr. it was supposed to be like 400 words but instead it's like 1400, rip me. enjoy!

“Wake up fuckers, it’s Christmas!”

Party’s voice jolted Fun Ghoul awake, and he tumbled out of bed, hitting the floor with a curse.

“Fuck you, too,” he muttered at Jet Star’s laughter. Naturally, the Kid was already awake, and Grace seemed to be with Party Poison.

Ghoul groaned and rolled over, pulling his blankets tighter around him. Maybe if he tried hard enough he could get back to sleep.

He had no such luck. Kobra strolled over and nudged him with his foot; “You coming or not?” he asked. “Party’s outside.”

“Fine,” Ghoul said. “But if this turns out to be some sort of a prank, you guys are going to regret it.” He punctuated the statement by glaring at Kobra, then Jet.

Jet Star raised his hands in the air. “Hey, I had nothing to do with this.”

Kobra ignored them both, and the three made their way out of the diner.

“Holy shit,” Fun Ghoul said the moment he stepped out the door. “Wow. Fucking, wow.”

Grace and Party were standing in front of a Joshua tree draped in tinsel, colorful plastic ornaments, and shards of metal. Underneath it were seven boxes of different sizes, each unwrapped but with a tag and a bow on top of it.

“Merry Christmas from zone six!” Party Poison said, throwing a handful of sand. “Let’s just pretend that’s snow.”

Grace giggled. “Merry Christmas!” she repeated. “Now let’s open presents! Party won’t tell me what he got me but I know it’s gonna be good.”

“You went out to six just to get us a tree?” Kobra Kid asked. “When?”

“Yesterday, when the rest of you were doing inventory. And it’s not like it’s that far,” Poison added.

“Gas run my ass, I knew we weren’t running that low on it,” Jet Star said with satisfaction.

“But tell me this isn’t the best Christmas you’ve had in years. Anyways, we’ll do presents, but first,” he paused, and grabbed one of the boxes from behind him, “we feast!” He set the box down in the sand. “Gracie, if you will?”

Grace kneeled down and ripped the box open. “Whoa,” she said, eyes wide. Then, lightning-quick, she grabbed what looked like a white plastic container and jumped back to where she’d been standing before. “This one’s mine!” she shouted.

“Okay,” Poison said. “Ghoul, yours is labelled, since you’re allergic to fucking everything, but the rest of us can fight it out. But for the record, the scratched-up one is fucking mine.”

Fun Ghoul grabbed his container of food and split, joining Grace off to the side. After some argument, the remaining Killjoys decided that Kobra got the box that Poison had called, Poison got the smallest one, and Jet Star got what was left.

“Let’s eat inside, sand – I mean, snow – isn’t gonna go great with the only real food we’ve had in months,” Kobra suggested.

“Seconded,” Poison said, and the group filed back inside.

For a while, the only sounds were of eating, and a few moans of appreciation. Finally, Kobra Kid spoke.

“Real vegetables, and real meat. So, who’d you have to kill to get it?”

“Oh, nobody important,” Party said. “Just a horde of exterminators, some ‘runners, and I might have sold out to BLI in the end anyways. Worth it.”

“That’s a lie!” Grace protested. “You got it from Doctor D ‘cause you got him those old records and then you wouldn’t tell me what you asked for instead of just some carbs.”

“Wouldn’t want to spoil the surprise, Gracie. Speaking of surprises, are the rest of you ready for presents?”

Grace jumped up. “Yes! C’mon, everyone, presents!” She sprinted outside, shouting “Hurry up! Hurry up!” behind her.

The older Killjoys shared a look and then followed her. Grace already had a box in her hands, and she smiled as they stepped out the door. “So who’s first?” Party Poison asked.

“You are,” Grace said, shoving the box into his hands. “You gotta open my present for you.”

“If you say so, motorbaby,” Poison replied. He read the tag aloud – “To Poison, from Grace (and Pony)” – and opened the box; it was a nearly-complete set of paints. “That’s shiny, kid. Where’d you find them?”

“Pony found them in an old building and I traded xem for them,” Grace said proudly. “Xe gave me a discount so xyr name could be on the tag too.”

“Well these are gonna go great with my present for you,” Party said. “You should open it now.”

“Yes!” Grace shouted. She grabbed the box with her name on it and shook it, then yanked at the tape holding it closed. When the box finally opened, Grace looked at the contents for a long moment, before looking back at Party Poison. “Really?” she said.

“Yeah. I figured it’s time,” Party responded, and Grace launched herself at him in a hug.

“Thankyouthankyouthankyou!” she said. When she released him, she went back to the box and lifted out her gift: a black helmet, and a rebreather.

“You can put whatever design you like on it, and I’ll help you paint the helmet,” Party said. “Kobra, your turn.”

The bleach-blond carefully picked his own present from under the tree. He opened it slowly and began manipulating the controls of the Vend-A-Hack as soon as it was clear of the box. There was silence for a moment, then Kobra looked at Poison and said, “Thank you.”

Party Poison smiled at him, then spun to face the two standing behind him. “Jet Star’s turn!” he said.

“Aw, why not me?” Ghoul whined.

“Jet picked his food last, we shouldn’t make him wait for his present too. Also, I say so, and I’m in charge.”

“What is this, a dictatorship? You’re no better than those tyrants at BLI, Party. C’mon, guys, the voice of the one shouldn’t overpower the voice of the many,” Ghoul entreated the others.

“I’m actually with Poison on this one,” Kobra said.

“Me too,” said Grace.

“See? You’re outnumbered!” Party Poison declared.

“Collaborators, the lot of you,” Ghoul complained. “But I’ll wait, no thanks to you guys.”

“Glad that’s settled,” Jet Star said. He held a glossy new toolbox in his hands, and looked over at the self-proclaimed leader. “Thanks. I’ll get the Trans-Am running milkshake with these in no time.”

“Did you really just…? Don’t answer that, of course you did,” Ghoul said. “I’ll just open my present now.”

He walked over to the tree; there were two boxes left. “Hey, this other one’s for all of us, apparently,” he said, checking both to see which one was his.

“Yeah, that’s from Doctor D,” Party said. “He had Show Pony send it over yesterday, guess he didn’t trust us not to open it till today.”

“Paranoid old man,” Ghoul muttered, but his tone was fond. He made quick work of the minimal wrapping on his own present, and grinned as he saw what it was. “Hell fuckin’ yeah,” he said. “Am I allowed to put this in the Trans-Am, or will it stop it ‘running milkshake’?” he asked Jet Star.

“I guess, as long as you know how to use it and won’t blow us up,” Jet Star said.

“What a shame, I guess he won’t be able to then,” Poison proclaimed, complete with dramatic arm-waving.

Grace giggled.

“Shut up, or I might just have to test my new bazooka on you,” Ghoul warned.

“So who wants to open the group present?” Party asked, unsubtly changing the subject.

“I will!” Grace volunteered.

“Go ahead, kiddo,” Party Poison said, gesturing to the final box underneath the decorated Joshua tree.

Grace lifted it up and carried the box over to the rest of the group, setting it down in the middle of them. “The card says ‘Merry Christmas to my favorite Fabulous Killjoys, may the next year be better than the last.’” Grace opened the box, and the entire crew leaned in to see what the gift was.

It turned out to be several CD’s, each in its own labelled case. There was a mix for each Killjoy, and a few others with labels such as “for the way home” and “Riot Songs”.

“Shit,” Fun Ghoul said, summing up what everyone was thinking. “This is the shiniest thing since rayguns.”

“Hell yeah it is,” Poison said. “I’ll have Show Pony take the Doc something nice next time xe comes around. Wow.”

“Let’s take all this inside,” Ray said, motioning to the opened presents that lay scattered across the sand. “Just because it’s Christmas doesn’t mean there’s not things to do, and sand in machines is nearly as bad as sand in food.”

“You’re definitely not wrong,” Fun Ghoul said.

The Killjoys gathered their Christmas gifts and filed back into the diner. “Merry Christmas,” Grace said, beaming at the other four. “This is the best Christmas ever!”

**Author's Note:**

> hmu at [my tumblr](http://uponthedusk.tumblr.com) if you want to shout at me about danger days, i'm always willing to listen. i take requests, etc, stay tuned for a longer 5+1 dd/ybc fic, feedback will help me work on it faster!


End file.
